A Breakthrough Year

If my current self were to travel back one year ago and tell my at-that-time self what would be in store for him (er...me) in 2009, I/he wouldn't have believed a word of it.

If I had been told that I would have spent so much time during the first few months going out to the bars and drowning my sorrows with tequila shots...

If I had been told that I would see the last of Target before the year's end...

If I had been told (and this is the big one, folks...) that I would be entering Air Force basic training in January of 2010...

I would not have believed it.

2009 will be remembered as the year that everything changed.

I am not the same person mentally, physically, spiritually, morally, or any other -ally that I was last year.

Bad habits and obsessions are gone and have been replaced with perfectly healthy ones.

Relationships that were on the verge of dying have been restored and new friendships have sprung up.

Desires have changed.

Miracles have been seen.

For the first time in...ever...I know I am perfectly on the proper path.

The Air Force thing came about on account of a number of issues. Back in December of 2008 I was demoted from my team lead position at Target, and didn't take it very well. I spoke not a word of it to anybody outside of work for months. I was ashamed. I was hurt. I didn't really understand what had happened. With the massive raise and the rise in position came a high level of confidence and, consequently, a bit of a prideful attitude. I thought I would be able to spend the money, get the girl, and live happily ever after. Instead, I fell into debt, gave up on the girl, and found myself spending my evenings in the drinking establishments. Not the type of place I would expect to find myself. I'm not going to sit here and lie and say it wasn't fun, because it was. Great times, to be quite honest. But, as I spiraled deeper into that life, my Spirit began to kick in, and the wrongness of the situation became brutally apparent. It had to stop.

Joining the military is something that has always been on the back of my mind; something that I swore I would never do, but the thought has always been there, more than likely because my father made a career in the Air Force. Seeing where my life was heading and where the economy was heading, and just wanting to escape my current situation, the thought began to move a little bit forward in my brain. At around that time, and once I had confessed my demotion and drinking issues to my parents, my father suggested that I look into joining up. Which I did. I went online and began, for the first time ever, to see what the Air Force was all about. It took all of thirty minutes to realize that that was what I wanted to do. And needed to do. I sit here now and ponder my life, and I realize that, through all that has happened, my only regret is that I hadn't made that decision years ago.

The decision was made in April, and prayed about and pondered through May. After my trip to North Carolina to see my family in June, I got the ball rolling by sitting down with my recruiter, and got a date to go down to Dallas for processing. To make a long story short, I was disqualified, told that it would not be possible for me to get a waiver, that my hopes of joining the US military were gone, and I was sent home.

Dejected.

But not without hope.

You see, I knew beyond any doubt that I was on the right path. God had placed me there, and there was no way the journey was over. I can see now that it was a test of faith, and after many failures over the years, I passed this one. Not once did I not believe that He would come through. And He did. I have to believe that the only reason I am entering the Air Force is through absolute Divine intervention. As far as what that did for me spiritually, it brought me so extraordinarily close to Him; not a day goes by in which I don't remember how His hand reached down and kept me where I need to be. And not a day will go by during my time in the Air Force in which I don't recall how I got there.

A miracle.

So here I am, only a couple of weeks away. I wouldn't be human if I wasn't a little nervous, but there is absolutely no fear. No worry. No issues or concerns. I'm looking forward to the journey; and I'm not taking it alone. To understand that He will never leave or forsake me is empowering.

So, enough about the Air Force. What else happened in 2009?

I suppose one of the major occurrences, and I'm going to write about this in length at some point before I leave, but I need to mention it here, was how my casual interest in the Japanese pop group Morning Musume (dating back to April of 2007) turned into an all-out obsession of the Japanese pop world. That fandom has even managed to replace comic books as my main interest. And that's saying something.

Not coincidentally, the major fixation began back in April, right around the time the Air Force seeds were planted. I began to spend a lot of time with the music and the personalities, and realized that the whole scene pushed all the right buttons for me, more than I would have ever thought possible. Back then, understanding that I needed to make a lot of changes in my life, I cut ties to a number of rather unwholesome addictions and habits. The world of J-pop, while a bit of a guilty pleasure, is completely unguilty on my conscience, if that makes sense. It's fun. It's wholesome. It honestly keeps me in a very happy and healthy mindset. And there's no shame in the obsession. I don't think anybody really understands how much it all means to me and how much it has genuinely helped me over the last few months. I'm not afraid to allow that music and those girls to be something that defines who I am, and I honestly believe that it's been allowed into my life at such a high level of interest for good reason.

Now I guess I'll mention some frivolous stuff:

Video Games:

I bought a DS this year, which has proven to be awesome. The Ouendan games are spectacular, Scribblenauts is wonderfully bizarre, Pokemon Platinum is addicting as all get out. And I have the two DS Zelda games sitting there unplayed. That will be remedied in a few months.

Resident Evil 5 was brilliant.

I experienced Tomb Raider for the first time. Really fun, and Lara's...well...she's just great.

The Beatles Rock Band is one of the most produced-with-love things I've ever seen. So much care was taken to make it exactly what it needed to be.

Dead Space actually (but not literally) scared the crap out of me.

Halo 3: ODST was way better than I expected it to be. Had a lot of fun playing all the Firefight maps with my buddies.

Left 4 Dead provided many hours of wonderful online zombie-killing enjoyment.

From what I managed to play of Infinite Undiscovery, I think it could very well have been one of the greatest games ever. It's amazing, but the unrealized potential can be seen in nearly every aspect. I do, however, think it wins the award for Cutest Video Game Character Ever. I like to keep the ultra-cute Aya in my party at all times, even if I think somebody else would work better ^__^

Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 2 was the big one. The campaign was very nice, and the airport bit will never ever be forgotten. Undoubtedly and hands down the best multiplayer out there, though. It's absurdly fun and addictive.

Movies:

Hmm...

I didn't see a whole lot of movies last year.

I never go to the theater.

Let's see...

Watchmen was great, if not only to see the characters come to life.

Quantum of Solace ranks up there with the best of the Bond films. Daniel Craig is amazing.

Underworld 3 was good, despite the severe lackage of my beloved Kate Beckinsale.

Inglourious Basterds was a different movie than what I as expecting, and it took me a while to realize that I really loved it, but I really loved it.

If I had three thumbs, they'd all be up for District 9. Amazing.

Music:

Do I really need to say anything?

^__^

Comic Books:

Disney bought Marvel a while back, which was upsetting at the time, but I really haven't heard a whole lot about it since.

Matt Fraction's Iron Man story, "World's Most Wanted" was spectacular. The comic book highlight of the year, in my opinion.

Most of the year, of course, focused on Norman Osborn and the "Dark Reign," which has been quite compelling. I'm thinking that he's about to get his keester handed to him here in the next few months (which, as luck would have it, I'm going to miss out on).

All in all, the storytelling going on in Marvel Comics is the best storytelling going on in any medium right now. It's why I support them; it's why I don't mind spending quite a high percentage of my hard-earned cash on them. Really amazing stuff.

So...

2009 was good. It didn't start out that way, but ended up being the best year of my life. And I believe that the changes and the decisions that were made last year will lead into setting up this year and future years as even better ones.

Happy beginnings, 2010.

^_^|/