Insomnolence

^I changed my picture up there back to Konno because I'm still upset at Maimi for chopping her hair off :P

I'm hoping to get a couple hours of sleep tonight before I have to go to work, but right now I seem to be rather wide awake. It may have something to do with the fact that I totally lost track of the time, as I tend to get overly chatty when the sister is around. She appeared this evening, by the way; home for Thanksgiving and all. So that's cool.

I've been sleeping rather erratically lately, and I feel like I should be tired, but I'm just not. Thinking about my looming future isn't helping matters. People ask me if I'm nervous about the whole thing, and I'm quite honestly not. The idea of basic training really doesn't intimidate me or make me anxious. It is, however, rather overwhelming at times, which leads to a bit of stress-out, freak-out, break-down moments. And lack of sleep. Not to a point where I'm tossing and turning and thinking, "Oh man, what have I gotten myself into - I can't do this!" but it does keep me up at night (or during the day, or whenever I end up sleeping). Part of me wants to stop time and further delay my enlistment, while another part wants to walk out the door tomorrow and get it over with. I'm torn. And I'm wide awake. But I'm not all out of faith. And I'm definitely not lying naked on the floor.

I'd better clarify that I'm referencing song lyrics there, lest anyone thinks I've lost my ever-loving mind ^___^

I spent a good portion of today just sitting back and taking a bit of a break from everything, and listening to some music that I've had but haven't gotten around to really listening to. A friend lent me a CD of Itzhak Perlman playing some amazing "Fiddler On the Roof"-ish Israeli music. The man's a flippin' genius. Of course, if I had his 1714 Soil Stradivarius, I could play just as well. Heh. Yeah, right. I also finally really sat down and paid attention to the Hangry & Angry album. (Yes, folks, I just went from Perlman to Hangry & Angry - a Japanese goth/punk/chick-rock duo - I have eclectic taste; what can I say?) Pretty darn good overall. One song, "Doubt," seemed like it was ready to break into total epicness, but ended up being four minutes of unrealized potential. Really nice song, though, and one that will be getting tons of play-time during the course of my work-day.

Being not in front of the computer ought to improve my sleep chances, so off I go.